


Home for the Holidays

by theimaginesyouneveraskedfor



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Christmas, F/M, holiday au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2019-02-10 02:37:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12902154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor/pseuds/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor
Summary: The reader and Kili find themselves in the classic "be my fake boyfriend" scenario.





	Home for the Holidays

“Don’t worry, Mum,” You sighed into the phone as you zipped up your small bag, “I will be there on time.”

“Are you sure?” She asked with concern from her side, “The last time you ended up on the wrong side of town.”

“I told you to stop mentioning that,” You grumbled as you sat heavily upon your single bed, “Besides, now I know where I’m going…and Aunt Kim could live somewhere a bit more…accessible.”

“She likes the country,” Your mom returned and you were happy she could not see your frown, “I hope you’re bringing someone this time.”

“Not very likely,” You scoffed as you laid back on your mattress, “I already went over this–”

“Tell me you haven’t met one nice boy,” Your mother interrupted in her usual maternal manner, “Or are you hiding him from us?”

“No, Mum, there’s no one,” You assured her with frustration and a rap came at the door, “I’ve gotta go, there’s someone knocking.”

“Fine, [Y/N],” Your mom huffed, “But I’m sure you can still find someone to bring…you never bring any friends home.”

“Mum,” You begged as you stood, preparing to hang up.

“I would really love it if you did,” She insisted and you bit your cheek with irritation.

“Alright, Mum, we’ll see,” You said noncommittally, “But I’ve got to answer the door, I love you.”

“Bye, sweetie,” Your mom chimed, “Love you, too.”

“Bye, Mum,” You hit end and tucked your phone away, turning your attention back to the door as another knock sounded.

You opened the door with a sigh, wondering who it could be seeing as you were one of the last to head out for the holidays. You were relieved when it was not the RA but you could not help but feel a little surprised to come face to face with your downstairs neighbour, Kili.

“Oh, hey,” You said with a friendly smile, “You’re still here?”

“So are you,” He returned in his usual cheery manner, “Yeah, my flight got cancelled and I haven’t been able to get another…”

“Oh, well, that’s too bad,” You felt horrible as you recalled all the stories he had told you of his brother and how eager he had seemed to see him, “I was just on my way out.”

“I won’t keep you long,” He assured with a smile, “I was only hoping I could borrow the law textbook…mine kind of caught fire.”

“I’m not even going to ask,” You chuckled as you turned back to look at your bookshelf, hoping yours was not buried in the stack on the floor, “You can…Hey, um,” You paused as you looked back to him and the thoughts in your head aligned, “This may seem weird but do you want to come with me? To my family Christmas? Since you can’t go to yours.”

“I wouldn’t want to impose,” He returned as he rubbed his neck, “You really don’t–”

“Please,” You nearly pleaded, “I don’t think I can handle another on my own. My mother is killing me and it wouldn’t be an imposition at all.”

“Hmm, I guess it beats staying here alone,” He shrugged, “It’s a deal; law book for a Christmas date.”

“Sure,” You shook your head before you corrected him, “Christmas dinner.”

“You’re not luring me into some sort of trap, are you?” He intoned as he leaned against the door frame, “Your family aren’t lizard people, are they?

“Some of them,” You joked with a roll of your eyes, “But they won’t bite so long as you’re with me.”

“Well, then I should go pack,” He straightened up with a grin, “When do we leave?”

* * *

The car ride was too long and yet having a friend with you made it easier, though you had argued over the radio for a good half-hour and it had nearly ended with you driving off the road. Kili was great…in small doses and hours together in your small car was slowly making you realize that. He was not by any mean a bad person or unbearable but he sure could find the most creative ways to annoy you.

You had to put on your happy mix for the last hour of the drive as you knew you would be dealing with even more trouble from your family. You only hoped that Kili would distract them enough for you to evade them or at least dodge their questioning. To be honest, it would be rather interesting watching them interrogate Kili and you could quietly sip your eggnog in the corner.

“Alright,” You said as you pulled up your aunt’s drive where a dozen cars were already packed in, “I should warn you about a few things, before we go in; Uncle Carl likes to make horrible puns and Gerry will fight you for dessert. Also there’s two twins, Dennis and Darla, they will try to put gum in your hair or bite you; either or, you don’t want it to happen. Oh, and Aunt Kim will kiss you. You can try to fight it, but you’re better off to just let it happen.”

“Um, is she hot?” Kili joked as he looked to you with a bemused smile.

“She’s my aunt,” You returned, rolling your eyes, “But if you’re into middle-aged woman who knit then, yeah, she’s fine as hell.”

“I think I’ll be just alright if they’re anything like you,” He mused as he pulled the handle and pushed his door open, “If I can manage your weirdness…”

“You’re one to talk,” You replied as you opened your own door and stepped out into the snow, retrieving your gifts from the back as Kili grabbed the pies you had made, “The first time I met you, you were eating spaghetti in the middle of a philosophy lecture.”

“I was hungry,” He defended himself as you led him up the walk, “And I did offer you some.”

“You dropped a meatball on my arm,” You commented over your shoulder, “And did you need to bring garlic bread?”

“That’s the best part of pasta,” He argued and you chuckled as you knocked on the door.

“Well, sorry to disappoint,” You offered as he stepped up beside you at the door, “But we don’t usually serve garlic bread at Christmas dinner.”

The door opened as Kili chuckled quietly and your Aunt Kim stood before you in her Christmas sweater which tinkled as the jingle bells rang with the movement of her arms. You could always be assured that she would be in the most festive of outfits and this year was no exception. Atop her head was a pair of reindeer antlers and her nose was tipped by the classic Rudolph nose. You withheld a cringe at her overzealous attire and instead returned your own smile.

“Hey, Aunt Kim,” You greeted awkwardly, “I’m sorry we’re late…”

“No, you’re right on time,” She assured as she waved you inside, “And we? Who’s this lovely boy you’ve brought home with you?”

“This is Kili, my neighbour,” You explained as you stepped inside, “Kili, this is my Aunt Kim.”

“Neighbour?” She repeated doubtfully and you gave Kili a hidden grimace, “I wish I had neighbours who looked like that.”

“Enough, Aunt Kim,” You could not help a small laugh at her, “We brought gifts and Kili has the pies.”

“Oh, how sweet of you,” She turned to Kili and took the trays from him before pulling him into one of her usual hugs and kissing his cheek; you had warned him, “You actually baked for us.”

“Hey, I usually do,” You defended as you set down your boxes and received a similar greeting, “But you know, last year was a hectic year.”

“As was this year apparently,” A voice sounded from the doorway of the living room and you turned to look at your mother as you removed your hat, “I haven’t seen you since September, girlie.”

“I told you, Mum,” You grumbled as you began to undo your coat, “I tried.”

“Not hard enough,” She crossed to you and hugged you tightly, “At least you have the decency to call me every once in a while.”

“Ugh, I’m sorry,” You groaned, feeling worse than ever, “Alright? I promise, I’ll be there for next year’s Thanksgiving.”

“Of course you will,” She pursed her lips before she smiled once more, “And who is this? I thought you said you didn’t have a boyfriend.”

“This is her  _neighbour_ , Kili,” You Aunt Kim intoned coyly.

“Neighbour?” Your mother used the same tone your aunt had; those two were nothing but trouble when they were together, “Mm-hmm…Well, welcome to the party, Kili. I’m Dana, [Y/N]’s mum.”

“Yep, and now he’s met you,” You intoned shortly, “So, you can let us get our boots off before you jump on top of him.”

“Well, if you’re not going to–” Your aunt began with a wink.

“Aunt Kim, Mum!” You choked out in your embarrassment, “Please, we’ll be in in just a moment.”

Your aunt and mother grinned at each other before finally back out of the front hall and you let out an exasperated sigh. You turned back to Kili who looked more than ready to burst out in laughter. You bent and began to pull off your boots, restraining yourself from growling at the whole situation.

“Sorry,” You grumbled as Kili kicked off his own boots, “They’re…like that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” He smiled and his warm brown eyes lit up, “I couldn’t say my family is much less…eccentric.”

“Oh, I can only imagine,” You chuckled as you looked back to the door and listened to the chatter from the other room, “Time to descend into the abyss.”

* * *

The dinner had been less than appetizing as you had spent most of it trying not to choke on your food as your family interrogated Kili. Your Aunt made sure to seat you together and would not stop sending you winks throughout the meal. Your mother was cheerily chattering the whole time to your guest and you wondered if perhaps he would have had a better time back at the dorms. Yet, he seemed happy enough as he answered every question and added to your torment as he told your mother of how you had gotten lost several times in the same building.

Finally, you were released from the prison between Kili and your Uncle Carl who kept telling you how funny your ‘boyfriend’ was. You had given up correcting him and merely answered with growls and silent sips of your wine. You stood almost as soon as your Aunt Kim announced that you would be free until dessert and you nearly tripped over your chair as you fled another sly comment from your mother.

“Hey, wait for me,” Kili called from behind you, following you across the room, “You can’t leave me here with these vultures.”

“Oh, so you weren’t enjoying it?” You turned back as you reached the furthest corner, “‘Cause you could have fooled me.”

“Come on, [Y/N],” He intoned teasingly, “It’s not so bad, you could much worse than me.”

“I don’t mean it like that,” You assured as you shook your head, “But I hope at least that the food made up for it.”

“More than,” He replied as he patted his stomach, “I’m glad you invited me, though. It would have been gloomy all alone back at the dorms.”

“Maybe I should have just stayed there,” You frowned as you spotted your mom making vulgar gestures from across the room at you and Kili, “What is their problem?”

“What do you mean?” Kili looked over his shoulder and you both noticed how almost every person in the room was looking at you.

“They’re staring,” You said anxiously and your mom kept pointing at the ceiling.

“So they are,” He turned back with a look of confusion, “Now, it’s really getting weird.”

“Hey!” Darla appeared at your side with her brother Dennis, the twin children reminded you of that scene in  _The Shining_ , “You two! Kiss!”

“What? No?” You looked to Kili and he was once again failing to hide a smile.

“You have to,” Dennis ordered as he crossed his arms, “That’s the rules.”

“What rules?” You tilted your head with irritation.

“The rules of the mistletoe,” Darla explained and pointed above you.

You and Kili looked up in unison at the bunch of holly overhead and you wondered how you had missed the damned ornament. You sighed and shook your head, slowly turning to Kili with a desperate cringe.

“Doesn’t count,” You said to the twins, “And besides, we don’t have to follow your rules.”

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” Dennis began and his sister soon joined in.

“Shhh,” You tried to wave their voices away as they chanted.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” More voices joined the chorus and even the adults were now staring at you two expectantly and even clapping their hands.

“Uhh…” You looked back to Kili hoping he would save you but he did the exact opposite.

Before you could think to push him away, his lips were on yours and he turned you to him subtly with his hand upon your shoulder. You widened your eyes as he held you in for more than just a simple peck and you released a surprised squeak into his mouth. Finally, he released you and you stared back at his coy grin.

“What–” You began as you tried to ignore the silence which had replaced the chanting.

“It’s the rules,” He replied as his smirk grew, “Don’t want to be rude.”

“I–” You were struggling to find words as you could not fight away the tingle his lips had left upon your own.

“Now,” He looked up and jumped, grabbing the mistletoe with his hand and bringing it back down and holding it right above your head, “How about another?”

“Don’t you even–” You warned as you stepped out from below the holly.

“Aw, come on,” He neared you and you continued back away from him, “I’ve never known you to be a rule-breaker, [Y/N].”

“Stop it,” You tried to push his hand from above you and he grabbed you with his other and pulled you closer, placing a light peck on your lips.

You wriggled out of his grasp, trying not to blush and you did not want to enjoy this as much as you were. You stepped back again as he continued to follow you and you knew you were soon to be caught again. You dodged out of his reach and clumsily made your way back into the front hall, nearly tripping over a table leg as you did. He continued to taunt you with the mistletoe as he closed in and you looked desperately to the stairs just feet away.

“You think you can make it?” He asked as he quirked a brow.

“I don’t know,” You let yourself smile, not so intent on evading him now that you no longer had an audience, “You think you can catch me?”

You turned and made for the stairs as you heard him behind you and he clasped onto your sweater just as you were halfway up the flight. You giggled as you tried to release yourself and he turned you back to him with his own chuckle. He held up the mistletoe once more and you looked at it expectantly. He tossed it over his shoulder with a shrug before he pulled you close, kissing you once again and this time you let yourself close your eyes and against his warmth. 


End file.
